Losing Winning and More

OK, so I totally lost the blogging every day for 31 days.  I didn't plan.  I didn't even know about the challenge until about a day or two before hand.  I tried.  I did OK, for a little while, but not long enough.  Was it worth it?  Absolutely.  It made me continue to write.  Was it good?  Probably not, but that's OK, that's what re-writes are for.  Next year more planning.  I will succeed.  I want  to win.

It did help me become a winner on the next month's challenge.  As of yesterday I had written 50526 words in the month of November which I wanted far more than the 31 day blog.  I just won the National Novel Writing Month! Are all of those words good?  Is the story perfect?  Absolutely not!  I am sure there are great parts of it which are atrocious.  I'm OK with that.  That's what the re-write, the editing, the proof reading is all about.  I'll start that in January.

For now, I am just content to be able to set and achieve goals.  I have set myself up for success by building a new habit.  I have been able to build a bike riding habit during the winter and spring.  Now I am doing the same with the writing, and combining them. Can I keep both going?  I don't know yet, but even if I lose, it will have been worth the attempt.

Losing leads to winning, over time.

Detroit Lions, Reality, and a kick in the seat of my pants. Oh My!

Detroit Lions, Reality, and a kick in the seat of my pants.  Oh My!

I was told I have to accept reality that the Detroit Lions football team are just a bunch of heart-breakers.  Really?  Reality stinks!  If I accepted “reality” I sure couldn’t teach.  Reality says that half of the 5th graders don’t like to read.  They won’t be able - capable of doing term papers.  I sure wouldn’t have 23 current and former students grades 5-8 volunteer to try to write a 30,000 word novel in 30 days, just because they want to see if they can.  I wouldn’t have had so many students published.  I wouldn’t push the student who has seen more D’s and F’s than A’s and B’s to try so hard they are going home with only one D and no F’s on their grade card.  

OK, so the Lion’s have only made one playoff game in your lifetime, but finish that statement.  -- SO FAR!  This season’s not over and neither is your lifetime.  They are my underdog team, just like some students are the underdog.  Those who need just a little more love, a little more of a push, and someone to just believe in them.

Does my heart still get broken when on my birthday, they lose to Buffalo (really Buffalo?) in the last few minutes?  Just like when the student I have worked with all quarter, doesn’t turn in the assignment on the last day of the quarter when there’s nothing more I can do, and it causes their B to go to a C.  

But I know you, my friend, you root for the underdog too.  If you didn’t Sir Hugh would prevail.  The terrorists would win.  Patrick and Teddy would be lost. - Into the Killing Seas, available in January.

I refuse to accept reality.  I change reality every day, one tiny step at a time.  Some days I win, some days reality wins.  My students don’t need reality, but someone to believe in them and their dreams.  But I have hope, faith, and dreams, BIG dreams, I am not going to accept reality for me or my students.  The Detroit Lions will show you one day.  The Red Sox won.  The Seahawks won.  The Buccaneers won.  The Lion’s Day will come, and when it does, I’ll be in search of another underdog to root for.  

Chapter 1 Day 9

I have 23 kids signed up with permission slips to write novels!  That's huge!  I'm still pulling things together to get them ready to write which is causing me to get further behind with my own writing.  I don't want to be one of those teacher for whom it is written, "Those that can do, those that can't teach."

That saying just keeps weighing heavy on my heart.  I am NOT going to be what which I fear most.

So I guess I have at least 23 accountability partners!

Chapter 1 Day 8

And I wrote this yesterday and am just now posting it, because sometimes that's how it works.

It's been a couple of hectic days and I am still behind with my writing, but have I students signing up left and right to write a novel of their own.  I had to run an extra 40 mile errand which has cut into my writing time, but weekend is just around the corner!

Chapter 1 Day 7

It's been a tough day doing the 9-5, except my 9-5 is actually 5:30 am to 4:00 pm.  Followed by an argument with the local county government.  Followed by a quick dinner, and more work.

Then here I am struggling to get here just to write about writing.  I am getting further and further behind working on my nonfiction project.  I am also a couple of days behind but definitely still working on my NaNo project.

I am following a leader as we walk through what all I need to know before I start writing on the 1st.  I am still having problems getting to know my supporting characters.  I know some of them better than others, but I am working hard to get to know them.  They are there, they come to me when I least expect them.

And still the ideas come.  I know what I need to work on.  I know what I want to work on, but I have these very brief flashes of ideas.  I think they are brilliant and I want to follow them, but that just takes me from the projects I already have/want to start.  So I make it a point to make quick notes, and then try to return to what I am supposed to do.  There are more exciting writing projects yet to be written.

Chapter 1 Day 6

I'm at least keeping up with the blog.  I've been getting a little behind again on my 300 a day word goal.  I am sure that I still writing far more than 300 words a day.  It's just that those words are not on the writing project that I am supposed to be working on  - an incredible set of nonfiction books.  Instead, I am still writing, I'm keep up with the blog here daily, and I am working on the plotting and planning to participate in NaNo, which requires 100 - 200 words a day, at a minimum.

I am still keeping up with my other ideas, which I write as soon as they pop in my head.  All of this writing makes the ideas just keep coming.  So I write and draft until I feel like I have given all to the idea, at least have an idea where it's going OR not, which means that it's not yet meant to be.  But oh, the ideas which just keep coming.  I had forgotten about how powerful it is to have a steady flow of ideas, even when you can't use them, or can't use them yet.  So now I am back at -500 words but tomorrow is an all new day to try to start making up lost ground again.

Chapter 1 Day 5

Yesterday, Whoo Hoo!  I had an outstanding yesterday.  I was able to catch up from the writing I was supposed to be doing and plan for writing yet to come.

I keep a spreadsheet to help keep me on track.  I know if I am ahead words or behind words so that I can stay on tract.  I went from being -740 words or so to being up by over a hundred.  While that seem like much it is still a small win.  It's the habit that's is difficult to get going again.

I love planning the writing.  I love the writing.  I love the feeling after the writing.  I even love the rewriting.  It's the sitting down every day that I just can't get under control.  It's the habit that I have to develop.  I'm hoping that the 31 days of blogging followed by NaNoWriMo my habit should be well formed.

Chapter 1 Day 4

Ok, so here I am at the library.  I think the biggest thing that both helps encourage me and depress me terribly is the support I get from my husband.  This is the one day that he could sleep in, and most Saturday's that's what happens.  He sleeps, I grade, work on lesson plans, or hopefully write.  I've needed to get into the library for a couple of weeks now.  He got up just like he would for work, got around, we got to have breakfast together, and now he's getting to play games, his hobby and I am writing this blog and then I am going to get going on my next couple of writing projects.

How does that drive me nuts?  If I'm not doing what I'm supposed to - write.  He frequently will ask how things are going.  If I haven't been writing, it makes me feel awful to have that kind of support when I'm not living up to my end of the bargain.

Chapter 1 Day 3

It's difficult to keep writing when all you want to do is go to sleep.  It's been a painfully long week.  I love my job but there are times when it's emotionally draining.  I give it all I've got.  I'm further behind than I had planned to be, but tomorrow is catch-up Saturday.  I can't wait, nearly every day I have had a new idea that I just keep falling in love with.

Chapter 1 Day 2

My deal was that I was supposed to write 300 words a day on my non-fiction books.  I have done a terrific job outlining.  I think I have outlined myself silly.  I should be ready to go.  I know what I want to say.  I know how I want it to look.  I know what I am supposed to do.  I was actually sitting in my chair(s) twice yesterday.  I had the time.  I was working at getting ready to go.  I had myself psyched to "do this thing".

AND then. . .

Yesterday, I checked a quick email to discover NaNoWriMo has a young writer's version Young Writer's Program, which took an hour to look into, print materials off.  Of course, I needed to go talk with the principal to see what she thought of the idea.  My writing time was gone.

I go home after teaching all day.  I found this blog linky.  The very one I am working on right this very minute.  I spent an hour working on it.  Then I discovered someone working on a way to plan for NaNoWriMo.  So I signed up for that and added the first post to that.  I don't want to fail at that this year.

So here it is October 2 and I'm already 300 words behind in my goal.  300 words, not impossible to over come - it's the chicken in me which keeps seeking ways to not actually do what I am supposed to.

Chapter 1

Today I have signed up for two different challenges to help me get back into the swing of writing, 31 Days and NaNoWriMo Prep Month.  Thank you to all of my friends on 30 Days of Hustle for giving me the kick I needed.

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

Day 5

Day 6

Day 7